Being Content In A World That is Never Content

Today is beautiful. For the past two days it has rained and that was beautiful. I woke up early this morning so that I could go to starbucks and do work. This is what greated me: A nice warm shower. The sun coming up on a beautiful fall day. Brisk weather to let me know that fall has finally arrived here. A nice quiet morning at Starbucks with a delicious blueberry muffin and a nice grande carmel macchiato. Walking onto campus and glancing up and down the mall to see trees of every color greating me with falling leaves. It was a beautifully breathtaking, peacefilling, sight.
Today for the first time since I have arrived here at school.... I feel peace.

I have been so busy with homework, internship, ice rink work, Thespian stuff, THON canning/planning, THON Morale, and everything else in this world that tells me I always need more, that I forgot to take a step back and look around. When I finally did, the beauty of fall brought me to my knees. Not literally, but I sure felt that way. God has created this beauty that we daily ignore because something better or more time consuming or thought consuming is in this world. Our world is never satisfied. We are always being told there there is more to do, more to see, more important things then what is around us. But stop and look. Where ever you are right now, your office cubicle, in a classroom with 450 other students, in your room, on your deck, in a computer lab, wherever, just stop and take in the beauty. Think about all the reasons God has placed this place in your life. Think about the beauty of that gray wall between you and the guy who drinks 50 cups of coffe and has that horrible looking lunch at work, think about the reasons why you are where you are and just be content. For one moment just be content and thank God for everything he has placed in your life because there is nothing better then where you are right now. After all, things could be a lot worse.

Be content in a world that is never content.

It is so beautiful how God does these things to us. Last night I met with my Morale team to think of a name and we did no work at all. Instead we spent the time getting to know each other. It was perhaps one of the best nights of my life. I got to know so many people who I will be working closely with until the end of Feburary and everything we do will be FTK (For The Kids) or FTD (For the Dancers). Its really beautiful.

But alas I have class and must be off.
Remember: BE CONTENT!

FTK/FTD
ME~

Cause I've been in love before and I've found that love was more than just holding hands

So i just realized what a depressed bum I've been in the last few entries. Why did I choose to live that way? What did I do to make my life miserable? Because I know that if something is bad in my life, more than likely, I made it that way. Because the Lord wants what's best for me and therefore, if I am struggling with things that are causing me pain, I am keeping them from the Lord. Well enough of that... I am done! Alas! I have chosen to once more give heart fully to God. WHEEEEEE! It's such a freeing feeling.

Ok so it's not as easy as that. It takes a lot of steps and yes it is very freeing. I have chosen to accept and make the best of my living situation. Forget about boys until God places them into my life and Live a life worthy of the Father's love. But we are never fully worthy of the Father's love, we are always dirty and stained but He loves us anyway. Making us White as Snow when we confess our sins to Him. Is He not beautiful? Is He not the studliest man you have ever seen? And even though He is fully man and fully God we can love Him just the same. That beautifully amazing grace that has Saved through a Father's love for a Son and their love for what they have created. Us.

It takes my breath away everytime kids. Everytime.

I wish this heat would die down. I am excited cause it is supposed to be 68 or something tomorrow...thats a good drop around here from the 85 + humidity we have been getting. I will be able to exercise without fainting. Dance, sing, and live without being sick.

Oh but I am sick, we just aren't quite sure what's wrong with me yet. It's going to be ok though. I trust that I will be ok. The Lord has done wonderful things in and through me. He will take care of me. He's my rock on which I stand.

Oh what fun I have been having! Dance parties, Juggling, Hayrides, Singing, Bible Study, and Acting I couldn't ask for more. But we all become blindsided by our problems and they take over us. THey cause us pain and make us lazy. That will be no more of me. I have choosen action against the problems of my life. I am so excited to start!

Until a rainy day!!!!!
As always.
Me

keepin thoughts part 2

Sometimes I think of a perfect day with many inperfections. Of getting lost on they way to our destinatio and of being the only one able to calm you down. I think of the show and the song. The Jekyll and Hyde club and the creepy alien thing. Of bad bathroom stories and the filming of Spiderman 3. I think about riding home with my head on your shoulder. And about your mom giving me directions. I think about the stars, the smile, my hands in yours and the words you couldn't say. I think of the line; "This is how I know, this is what I see, this is love to me." and I think about how with the words you couldn't say, I ruined it all. It's a memory I can't seem to erase.

more thoughts to be kept. Sometimes I wonder why I just cant erase that stupid memory.