I Surf Skittles

Why yes, yes I do. I do surf skittles.
Now that I think about it it...that's not a bad idea.
Today was quite a day!

I got up, went to class, spent time relaxing in the HUB, went to theatre. I met a buddy at Starbucks and we chatted for a long time. I love starbucks and I love that they know me and my order. It's really sweet. Also.... I spent time with my little today. We played Basketball and just had a blast. Iowa played with us and it was sweet to hang out with her. To think she lives upstairs and we hardly ever see each other.

Anyways little blessing such as days spent with great people, like today are just amazing. I have done little work these days. I really should do more work but I think its time for Spring Break. I just can not stand doing work. Tomorrow I will have lots of time to do lots of work.

To say I have not been doing work is an understatement. I have been doing my stuff for my Support for Vail. It's time consuming but I don't mind. I'm really super excited even though its a summer away from home.

As my baptism draws closer, I am becoming extremely excited. I can't wait!!!!!

Life is Good, God is GOOD!!!!
PTL!!!!!!!!!!

Until less snowy days.

Let's Walk

So in light of my amazing two weekends past. I have realized that I have had my times of trouble. Earlier posts that are not so happy. I would delete them, but it takes a long time and well being the busy busy college student that I am, I just don't have that time.

Today was a good day. I had two exams. It was a bit nerve racking. I got through them and did ok, but not as well as I would have liked. This means that I really have to step up and get things done.

So I have gone through everything I need to for Sunday. I meet with the Pastor on Saturday and then Sunday is the big day!!!! I'm excited. My parents seem cool with it and my grandmom was ok with it. I know things have been difficult since I decided that I will be going to Vail this summer but I do have to grow up sometime and I do love her very much. It's going to be just as hard on me to miss the big family vacation. However I need to pick my scripture verse for Sunday. So many have impacted my life I just don't want to pick one. I have to make sure its a good one. haha.

I hope things pick up again soon. I am going to try and do some more volunteer work besides being a Big Sister. I also have TAPS next week for Crazy For You and then finally, Spring Break. Ah good old Spring Break!!! I am also working like crazy on my: He Who Stole My Heart powerpoint/presentation. I hope I get to talk with some high school girls over break that would be really sweet.

well I better go and catch up on some work....or maybe get ahead of my work.
Until Warmer Days!

My chains are gone, I've been set free

My God, My Savior has ransomed me
and like a flood
His mercy rains
Unending Love
Amazing Grace
~Chris Tomlin~

I'm in awe of what God has the power to do in my life. I'm going to be baptized again next Sunday!!!!!! I can hardly contain my excitement!!!!!!!!! I will be able to reaffirm my faith with my friends gathered around me!!! My parents won't be able to make the trip but that's quite alright I guess. I mean I don't know another time I would be able to do it. Of course the bestest won't be able to make it but that's ok. He'll be there in spirit I'm sure. AHHHHHHH I"M PUMPED! GOD IS GOOD PEOPLE GOD IS GOOD!

If You haven't heard the new Switchfoot Album you should. It's great and I love it!!!! YAY SWITCHFOOT!
If You haven't seen the new Bond movie You should. It's good too!!!

I finished my support letter for Vail and hopefully will send it out soon. I have selected the 5 people I am going to pray for during lent. I have also started on the power point for the HE WHO CAPTURED MY HEART presentation. I am hoping to give it during Spring Break but who knows. I might not be able to give it until after I get back from Vail. Either way God will make it happen and I hope to get many high school girls thinking about more than just sex and being perfect. Who knows!

I should go and study but I can't focus. AHHH GOD IS SOOOOOOOO GOOD!

If I gave you my hand

Would you take it and make me the happiest man in the world
if I told you my heart couldn't beat one more minute without you girl.
~Josh Turner~

Loving that man right there. His Bass is BEAUTIFUL!

T-Dogg is sick and not updating so that stinks cause I have nothing to read! haha. Anyways what is going on with me....I have to write a resume and a fundraising letter this weekend. That's crazy I know. On top of that I have a lot of other work to get done AND I REALLY WANT TO SEE CASINO ROYALE!!!! It's playing here this weekend for free and I have to see it.

Tomorrow I have to wake up at the break of dawn to go to Harrisburg with one of my classes for extra credit. The FCC is holding a hearing on media ownership. I think it will be fun! Besides it gets me out of this little old town for a while. After that its CHRIS TOMLIN!!!!!!!!!!!! A night of Praise and Worship with the most amazing girls on this earth!!! That's exciting.

With THON over there's not much for me to do right now. Things will pick up when Crazy For You starts picking up. I'm going to try for lighting or sound for this show. Then in April I am crewing Mother Courage for the School of Theatre!!! YAY my first SOT show!!!Oh yeah and A sweets is in it and I love her cause she's awesome!

Well its late and I have to wake up early so I'm gonna get going.
here is the quote of the day


"A woman doesnt want to be the adventure, she wants to be caught up in something greater than herself." ~From the book "Wild at Heart"

It's true...MEN READ THAT BOOK! and Eric Ludy's God's Gift to Women! They are GREAT books!

until later nights!

And it hit me like a ton of bricks

Today it finally hit me:

I hate someone so much that I love them. Do you ever feel like that?. You absolutely just hate everything and then you're like I don't hate them at all, I love them.

Yeah see I can't hate him because I love him. IT STINKS. This is getting really hard for me. What am I supposed to do? Walk up to him and go, "I'm sorry for loving you?" I mean seriously. Nothing will be as real as this feeling I have.

Drrrr.

Many Hearts, FTK, One Home, Here To Stay!

Well THON is over and done with and it's really sad because I wish I had something else to look forward to.

This weekend was a blast and we did it all FOR THE KIDS!!! We raised over $5.2 Million for the Four Diamonds Fund and the Kids!

Some highlights:
Line Dance!!!! it goes like this:

*starts off with 007 music so sneak around with your hands in gun position pulled to your chest*
then there is a Stretch
1, 2, 3 “BALLIN!”
Thon is the place for me
Welcome to the BJC
Dancing strong for 46
Hey DJ spin that Disc!
F to the T K
For the Kids is what we say
F to the TK
"For The Kids" is what WE say
D to the A
to the NCERS
GO DANCERS!
Globo Gym, in Rec Hall
Watch TV, just don't fall
Creamery, down the block
Nathan's lights what a shock!
WebMail 2 drops the ball
"Creepy" Feed, tells it all
Penn State, super fans
Zombie Nation breaks the stands

Chorus: Roar Lions Roar!
T-H-O-N
THON 2007
FOR THE KIDS!
Loyal to...
White and Blue
Anything is possible...
Dreams Come True!!!

Freshman Class all-time high
Football tickets hard to buy
Puz breaks record with no fear
Connor stays for one more year
Outback Bowl's the place to be!
State's the only ten I see
Women's soccer wins again
You can't touch our lion's den
World Cup takes the stage
Head butt hits front page
Beckham comes to Galaxy
J-Mac can shoot the three
L.T. scores with power!
Say farewell to Coach Cowher
Saints march into town
Gators wear a double crown
Dimonds in the stands
Di-diamonds on the floor
Diamonds are for Hershey
And we've got 4!
J.T. Brings it back
So do Bond and Captain Jack
Samuel L. flies with snakes
Ricky Bobby "Shakes and Bakes"
Cars cruise the street
Dancers move those Happy Feet
(Chours)
Katie Couric, nightly news
Who will fill Bob Barker's shoes?
Bindi Irwin follows Dad
Crikey - he'd be so glad
Democrats paint house blue
First female speaker too
Science lead us down wrong route
Planet Pluto gets the boot

Everybody grab your can!
(7 claps)
And shake your money maker!!!
(Stretch break) Up in the gym just working on my fitness
(Chorus)
Dancin' all on the floor
Until we find a cure
Jersey Boys, Broadway fame
Gotta - Getcha head in the game
Trump and Rosie fight some more
Britney shows K-Fed the door
Stretch pants, Skinny jeans
Don't get mad, don't be mean

(Dance break)

We stand behind their courage
And wisdom at great length
We learn from their honesty
And celebrate their strength
Many Hearts
FTK
One Home
Here to stay
THON 07 rockin' out!
On our feet stand and shout!
Our diamonds are forever
With pride we stand together
Fight on state!

playing with the kids
SLIDES OF STRENGTH!
being crazy with my friends
the many people who came on the floor to visit us
THE BLUE BAND SHOWED UP!!!
GREEN WINNING COLOR WARS
The Last Four Hours

I can go on forever. I had a blast. Staying on your feet and awake for 46 hrs isnt as hard as it sounds. Today everyone kept asking me how I was doing and I kept sayin "I'm ready to do another 46 BRING IT ON!" haha.

Thanks for everyone who came up to support me and the other dancers!!!!!!

It was weird this weekend I'm not going to lie. There were times when I just wished for support that wasn't there. I wanted to cross the line a few times and hope that it was there. I hate the fact that everything is just a show for his friends or at least that's how I feel because everytime he remotely acknowledges me it's with a group of people there. It makes me mad that he is "confused" and if he was where he said he was a while ago he would know where God is taking him or least have a sense. I thought he would grow more once he got up to school after being home for so long away from people who encouraged him, but I was wrong. I realize that God may not have anything planned for us and this is fine. I just need God to tell me that Himself or show me that Himself because until He says so, I will always believe that where my heart is leading me, is the place I'm supposed to be. It stinks waiting around for someone who doesn't give a left arm about you but what can you do? Hope that maybe the next time you take a big step they are there to support you with everything they have , to love you for it, or whatever. Sometimes life is just that way.

So I guess the next thing I have to look forward to is Vail, Co this summer. Well, so far he has no idea I'm going there and probably won't find out or care. Why would he care since he's going home to his precious angel? Ah well sometimes things are just like that.

until later days
FTK

Happy Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day kids!

So we had off from class today because it snowed about 1 foot here. It's pretty sweet to be able to walk outside throw yourself into the lawn and land on fluffy white snow. A little cold but that's ok. I have been watching movies all day. Newsies, She's The Man, Serendipity, and The Lake House. It's Valentine's Day and I had no surprise valentine. I didn't expect one, but it would have been nice.

This day last year: My birthday gift finally arrived in Mr. Music's Mailbox and he then gave it to me before we went to see The Boyfriend(a musical). It was perhaps one of the best gifts I have ever gotten and came with a note that said, "Happy Birthday, when life gets you down, remember you can fly." I can't believe I fell for that.

I was brushing my teeth tonight and I had one of those flashback moments to last may. We had gone down the beach 4 of us just to relax and start the summer off well. Mr. Music and I were brushing out teeth in the bathroom and he finished before I did. He waited for me as I was brushing my teeth making a comment on how hard I brushed them. When I finished he wrapped his arms around me. I remember looking in the mirror and smiling at him, and then he said just one word: Perfect.

Sometimes stuff like that just gets me thinking. I swear I saw forever right then. I guess guys just see things one hour at a time instead of taking the time to realize that what they are really doing is just hurting someone by leading them on to believe they could ever beat out someone who is prettier, smarter, a better friend, known longer, etc.

and the funny thing is: I don't hate him one bit for it. I just pray for him every night.

Though you've been acting cold to him You know your hreat is sold to him

The title is from the Pajama Game.

So we talked in Bible Study today about love and what perfect love looks like. We also talked about how God is Love. It really got me to think about a lot of things. Unconditional love. Wow. What a set of words.

Anyway, I figured some things out. My heart is sold to him. That has been plane from the start. In Bible Study we were asked to think about our relationships and if we loved the other person before we entered into relationships with them? I think in the case of Mr. Music (lets just call him that) I did love him. I loved him as a brother in Christ. I say that because at that time in my life, the summer before college, I was just beginning my incredible journey with Christ. I was constantly in prayer and just praying for everyone even people I had yet to meet. As our friendship grew, so did my love for him as a brother in Christ. I was in constant prayer for him and I cared about him. Even during our relationship, constantly prayed for him and I was constantly praying about our relationship. I wanted to be Glorifying God in every way. I realize that there were some areas that we needed to work on in the Glorifying God bit, however my relationship with Christ never faltered. And the aftermath? I feel the same. I am constantly praying for him and his relationship with God to bloom. I continue to pray for God to shape his heart into one of a warrior and give him a good Christian Role model. I am a prayer warrior for my brother in Christ. It hurts not to know what is happening and it hurts even more to know that during the course of our friendship, he did not accept my prayers or my view of things because of my denomination. Little he knows of my faith that he will let God lead him to where God wants him to be. It is sad to see that he will not trust God enough to say "Ok, Lord I think you are calling me on a missions trip or a summer project and I will go." It is sad to see that he is too afraid of leaving his comfort zone and be a warrior for God. But I will pray on because there is something about this brother of Christ that is driving me to pray for him every night and every day. What it is, I have not found out myself. I have every reason to kick him from my memory, but I will fight on in prayer for him.

I love being a prayer warrior. If you have any requests, send them to me. Know that even though I might not know you, I am praying for you. I am praying that will you come to know the Lord in beautiful ways. For God is Love and He loves you more than you will ever realize.

1 John 4:7-21

Incase I don't get around to writing....Happy Valentine's Day

We're still fightin it

Today I am 20.

I refuse to grow up.
I will stay young forever at least in my heart.

I had a great weekend at home. So great I didn't want to leave. I am really only looking forward to the dance marathon I am doing in a few days. That's it. After that I was to leave school. I don't want to be here any more. It's getting to be too much for me. Too much stress, too disappointing, and too fake.

There is nothing more comforting than being with the ones you love. It is perhaps the most reassuring thing in the world and when you leave that comfort zone everything else feels empty. Which is why it is important to surround yourself with people who love and care about you the way you love and care about them. For life is about Relationships.

Valentine's Day is a few days away. I quit.

Happy Feet

So tonight I saw Savion Glover!!!!!
THAT GUY IS NUTS!!!! He'S AMAZING!!!!!!! I LOVE IT! It was such a good present to myself.
So next week, when I'm dancing in THON and tired, I'm gonna think of the Kids and I'm gonna think of Savion Glover preforming for an hour and a half, tapping like a nut.

So here it is....The weekend at home. Canning for the Kids! and celebrating my birthday. It will be fun. One thing will be missing but that's ok. Whatever. I'll get by like always.

PTL
FTK
Ciao for Now!

So come pick me up...I've Landed

YAY COLTS!!!!! THEY RULE!

that's really all I have to say except:

I didn't get props master for C4U.
My tap teacher got Choreographer for Crazy For You!!!! YAY!!!


That's is...leave some love if you feel compelled.

Every Great magic trick consists of three acts... The Pledge, The Turn, and The Prestige

GO SEE THE PRESTIGE ITS GREAT!!!!

So this weekend was a lot of fun but also very difficult for me. I started celebrating my birthday even though its a good week away. Friday the hockey team kicked butt and then I got to have a good time with my new roommate, T Dogg, and my neighbor. It was fun. Saturday was really chill. I did nothing all day...seriously nothing. I bought a dress..that's it. But I finally bought my little black dress! Then I went to Red Lobster with T Dogg for some Birfday dinner which was goooood. Then i saw The Prestige!!!! It was GREAT!!!!! Then I went to bed...fun huh?

Today is good. I went to breakfast with TDogg and wished him Happy Journies home. Then I went to church which was really really good. Pastor A dogg is wonderful! Then I just chilled here. I am going to go juggling in a little bit and then I have a meeting with the Thespians to discuss all kinds of fun things. Then I can finally watch the rest of the Super Bowl!!! GO COLTS!!!! YAY!!!

Well that's really it. I mean one element was missing this weekend and will be missing THON weekend and Next week and all the times after that. It's an element God has complete control over. SOmething I can't fix because I'm a girl and it's not my place. I'm actually staying in my place and I guess it's not good enough. Only God can tell.

So come pick me up, I've landed~Ben Folds

Ciao

Where has that old man gone, Lost in a February Song...

Tell him it won't be long
till he opens his eyes
and I never want to let you down
forgive me if I slip away
February Song~Josh Groban~

Welcome to February. This is a fun month for me. My brithday is in this month and the dance marathon is in this month. Also, I get to see Savion Glover and a play. It's going to be fun.

T-Dogg comes up tomorrow to help me begin my brithday celebrations even though they are a bit early. It will be a great weekend however.

I also am not a fan of this month...Right smack in the middle of February comes the holiday I am not a fan of. Well In fantasy land I am a fan of it, but most years I am not. It is Valentine's Day. Last year I asked for a sign on Valentine's Day and I got one. Apparently, I can fly. This year once again I will be single. I wish with all of my wishes that I wasn't. I wish I was spending it with that special someone. I do have a love. However, he just doesn't love me, infact we are not even speaking which makes my life a bit rougher than I would like it to be. and in the midst of everything going on in my life, I would just like to hear that he cares. That everything I am doing in my life he is proud and supportive. That he cares. If I was going to fall off a cliff tomorrow, I would just like to know that whatever it was meant something. He can stay wrapped around the finger he has been wrapped around for some time now, I don't care. I just wish I knew it mattered. However, I want the truth. The honest truth is that my friendship means nothing to him since he can not man up enough to talk to me or even accept me as a friend. He's afraid. Well life is about taking chances. I took a HUGE chance. I said yes last April only to get my heart torn in two and to sit in day dreams until this very day. Each day was a chance that I took with prayer, praise, and Grace of God. Whatever I had, was a blessing. He was beautiful, inspiring, full of life, when he was with me, he was himself. That in itself was beautiful. I miss him, I'm not afraid to admit that. It hurts to know he doesn't care.
I wish it wasn't Valentine's Day. I wish my heart wouldn't fill my head with silly dreams of roses with a card or a date that I knew nothing about, except that it was to be special. I wish some Christian guy would man up and win my heart over so I could forget this all. Even if it's not meant to be forgotten, I don't like thinking that anything could happen again.

Dear Lord,
Please keep my heart in Your hands. Protect it with all Your grace. Give me peace to know that You and You alone have picked out that one very very special guy who will win my heart over. Help me to be ok with the fact that I am single. Let me live in Your joy. You are Everlasting, Almighty, and All Knowing.


And so this is where I end. But I will always end in Hope. I know whoever he is, whereever he is...he'll come find me. Until then it's fantasy land.

Faith, Trust, and Pixie Dust.